skinny one fat one

It's that most wonderful time of the year. When sleigh bells are ringing and snow balls are slinging, we scout out, sneak up on and slaughter an unsuspecting tree, haul out the boxes and boxes of ornaments, and decorate until eggnog-induced IBS growls drown out the More By Four "Merry Christmas Baby" CD.

We put the fake tree up in the dining room
this year. It is decorated with a couple
decades of "precious" Campbell Soups
Collectables, if there really is such a thing.
I don't get it. Never did. I think the tree would
be more attractive if it were decorated with
Kings Fancy Mixed Nuts wrappers and crisp
strips of bacon.

Yes, this tree really is as fat as it looks.
Probably fatter. It swallowed Santa. Sorry
kids, there will be no presents this year. ;-(